Am I Blue…Am I Blue…

“Am I blue… Am I blue… Ain’t these tears, in these eyes telling you?”

It seems that planning meals for me is a pain in the neck. First of all, it’s not cheap to stock up on the items that are recommended. Second of all, it’s difficult to stick to a plan when your hunger, taste and feeling ill get in the way. My plan suffers from all of them. For some reason, I can be ravenously hungry, fix something that sounds so good and when I lift the fork to my mouth in anticipation of good flavor, my stomach churns and my body shouts “In your dreams, doll!!! If  you don’t drop that fork and walk away” (I know, it could be a remake of dead man walking) “you are going to upchuck all over your pretty jeans and sweatshirt!!!!.” So I sit there with a puzzled look on my face and wonder what in the world is happening here.

Other times, I am so hungry that I eat my meager portions that the diabetic book recommends and all it did was whet my appetite for more. What a guilt trip that is after I load up and have all I want. Homemade Spaghetti and meatballs, pizza and some veggies are the biggest culprits. And don’t forget the all knowing all seeing, sugar. I have never been a sugar freak. I could go for a year and never eat a piece of candy, pie, cake or cookies. I baked for my boys and hubby and could easily pass on all of it, The items I listed before that I can hardly eat without over eating are a few of the things I loved instead of sweets. But now???? After diabetes moved in that extra room down the hall??? I crave sugar like a madman or woman. I crave ice cold milk in big tumblers, any form of candy or cake or pie or cobbler. If you set a large baking dish of rhubarb or cherry cobbler in front of me you had better get out of the way or get hurt. I am not worried about weight so it makes sense that I can eat that, right? Wrong! Those are some of the things that make my glucose levels spike. I now know the feeling bad signs that I have had too much. I feel out of sorts, bordering on full out depression, tired and weak, and more. And I can correlate it with what I had eaten over the last 12 hrs. or so.

How do we fight that? How do we re-train ourselves to love the new diet. I  know that I am already changing since I can’t eat half of what I used to without feeling like I will burst and all that sugar will scatter itself all over the dining room table. Fortunately I have found some excellent sites across the internet and I will be adding more as time goes by. If you know of some  I have  missed, please list the url’s in your comments and I will add them to the list and give you credit for finding it/them.  With out further yakking from me, check out the page of diabetic resources at the top of the home page. See you later!

Kath

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